


Girls Will Be Boys & Boys Will Be Girls.

by TheseusInTheMaze



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Androgyny, Crossdressing, Gender Issues, Multi, Rimming, strap on
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-27
Updated: 2016-07-27
Packaged: 2018-07-27 05:03:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7604569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheseusInTheMaze/pseuds/TheseusInTheMaze
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Who doesn't love a good night of genderfuckery?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Girls Will Be Boys & Boys Will Be Girls.

**Author's Note:**

> I've referenced three different songs about genderfuckery in this fic. It's surprisingly hard to find them!

Dan Avidan had gone through most of his adult life under the assumption that he more or less knew who he was. He knew who his parents were, his favorite foods, his interests, his preferences. These were all constants in his life, rarely shifting, and never drastically.

And then he met Arin Hanson.

A lot of Dan's life seemed to be arranging itself that way. Everything was something, until Arin came into the picture, at which point it all became something different. It was like he'd need some marker, if he ever wrote a memoir. PA - Pre Arin, and AA - After Arin. 

When Dan met Arin, Dan was a straight dude. The occasional thought fluttered across his mind like an errant butterfly, but nothing in life is an absolute, after all. Only a Sith deals in absolutes and all that. Then he met Arin, and shit went complicated. 

So Dan was a dude who liked dudes. But not all dudes. Some dudes. And he still absolutely adored women, in all the variations that they came in. Which made sense. It was totally normal to have a single target sexuality. Even if that target had... widened, as it were, and now Dan found himself expressing interests in... well, other guys. But only the really good looking ones. Who wouldn't want to get on their knees for Markiplier, after all? 

Then there was the whole Arin in a dress being like the hottest thing ever, but again, not too confusing - Dan liked women, Dan liked Arin. Arin dressed as a woman was just the perfect combination of things, peanut butter and chocolate, to go with the cliche. Arin in a dress, all curvy hips and luscious thighs... well, that was the thing of dreams, minus the weird bits that also come with dreams. Talking trees and walking stones, that kind of thing. 

But Suzy... Suzy was wearing a suit. A man's suit. And not in the "teehee, look at me wearing my boyfriend's clothes" kind of way, which is admittedly quite appealing, like any other kind of dress up. No, she had bound her chest down, and there was a black leather harness holding a scarily realistic cock inside of her well fitted boxer-briefs. She had even tucked her hair into a top hat, to utterly complete the look, and it was... it was doing things to Dan.

To say nothing of his own get up. When Suzy and Arin had insisted on taking him to a night of "genderfuckery" (Arin's words), he had protested. He was _not_ comfortable with the idea of wearing a dress, let alone in public. It had taken Suzy to convince him that he didn't have to go full lady - could try for some kind of androgynous look. Embrace his inner David Bowie and whatnot. Although he was way too hairy to pull off the David Bowie thing. Which was why he was currently wearing fishnet tights, a kilt, shit kicking boots, a camisole... the whole mess of it was just weird, and the weirdest part of it was how... nice it all felt. Arousing, comfortable. 

Man, he was getting strange in his old age.

"You people are fucking me up," Dan mumbled, walking slowly down the path towards Suzy and Arin's house, his long fingers laced with a set of small ones, and a set of big, blunt ones. "I was, like... something close to normal when I met you."

"I, uh, hate to break it to ya, buddy, but you were pretty weird when I met you," said Arin, and there was a lot of smirk in his voice. 

"I was not," Dan protested, letting go of Suzy's hand as she fiddled with the door. A piece of her hair was slipping down her face, escaped from her hat. Dan carefully tucked it behind her ear. "I was your normal red blooded American male."

"With freakishly huge thumbs," Suzy said helpfully, pushing the door open. "Hi kitties, we're home!" 

Dan followed after her, his whole body tired and horny, a confused kind of horny that was almost scary. This shit felt... it felt deeper than just arousal. Something visceral and primal, something that had been lurking in the back of his head for who even knew how long. 

"You're being mean," Dan huffed, leaning against the kitchen counter. "Me and my thumbs are offended."

"Far be it from me to offend your thumbs," said Suzy, and she turned around, placing the keys on the kitchen table and moving to stand directly in front of him in one smooth move. She took his hand in hers and kissed the tip of each finger, then took his thumb into her mouth, sucking on it, her tongue trailing across the very tip. 

“They, uh... they accept the apology,” stuttered Dan. His dick was hard, and he wasn't wearing his normal sort of underwear, and he'd been dealing with... strangeness of the feeling since he had walked into the Hanson-Berhow living room at the beginning of the night and seen Arin bent over, adjusting his fishnet stockings. The skirt of his green dress (which only just brushed the backs of his thighs) had ridden up, and there had been all of that glorious ass, right there on display. 

Anyone who didn't pop a boner from that would be fucking dead, in Dan's not so humble opinion. And then Suzy had come over, and she had on the suit, her face made up... differently, and she looked so much different, but still Suzy, and... Dan didn't even know. 

“You're zoning out,” Arin said, and his heavy bulk was right up against Dan's back, and when had that happened? The smooth, silky fabric was cool against his bare shoulders. The brush of his facial hair was ticklish against Dan's skin, and Dan shivered. 

Suzy was close now, staring up into his eyes, and she had done something with makeup to make her jaw look stronger, give a suggestion of stubble, and that was hot, in a way that honestly scared Dan a bit. He didn't know if he wanted to be someone who was turned on by strong jaws and stubble. Or at least, that wasn't who he was for a big chunk of his life. 

“You look worried. Is this okay?” Suzy's brow wrinkled, looking up at him with a concerned face. “I know this kinda thing can make you kind of uncomfortable.” 

“Shit,” mumbled Arin, right in Dan's ear. “I didn't think of that. Sorry, man.” He kept his arms around Dan's middle, rocking a bit. He was even wearing heels, which gave him a few inches on Dan. That was weird.

“It's, uh... it's complicated,” Dan mumbled, and he leaned down and kissed her, which would probably smudge her makeup, but it was a good distraction from the thoughts circling his head like a pair of angry dogs. 

Suzy tasted familiar, although the taste of her lipstick was stronger than usual. It took a moment for Dan to realize that at least part of it was _his_ lipstick, and that was pretty trippy too. He'd worn makeup before, but not usually... he usually didn't end up kissing people when he did. 

“What kind of complicated?” Suzy's voice was soft against Dan's lips, and he sighed, pulling her closer to him. He could feel the leather of her harness under the fitted fabric of her pants. Her dick was pressed against his own thigh. 

“You know. Identity shit. Stuff that's distracting when I've got two fucking hot people in front of me,” said Dan, and he made an appreciative noise as Arin's mouth nibbled down his neck. 

“Who's the other person? I'm behind ya, bro,” said Arin. His voice vibrated through his chest, almost ticklish against Dan's skin. 

“That wasn't even a good one,” Dan said, grinding his ass against Arin's cock, just because he could.

“Fuck you,” Arin said, carefully pushing aside the strap of Dan's camisole, then biting the spot, digging his teeth in. 

“I mean, if you really wanna, I can probably pencil it in,” Dan mumbled, grinding his hips against Suzy's. When she pressed closer to him, he could feel her bound breasts against his chest. He began to unbutton her shirt, the lapels of her blazer brushing against his wrist. When he saw the black fabric of her binder, he made to grab at the zipper of it and release it, but she grabbed his wrist and shook her head.

“Can I, uh... can I keep it on?” Suzy looked to the side, and it was her turn to wear a complicated expression. “I, um... can I ask for something?”

“Always,” Dan and Arin said at the same time. They then snickered, giving each other as much eye contact as was possible from the position they were in. 

“Can you call me something else? I, uh...” She swallowed, pressing her face into Dan's chest. “Actually, never mind.”

“No, babe,” Arin murmured, and he let go of Dan's middle to clumsily put his hand under Suzy's chin, making her look up into their faces. “C'mon. You're the only one here not wearing panties, and we've done weirder shit in our spare time.” His breath was ticklish against the side of Dan's neck. 

“You can tell us anything,” Dan said, and he felt like a bit of a hypocrite – pushing Suzy to tell her big deep secret, when he kept running away from whatever it was he was feeling about... all of this business. 

“I'm, uh....” Suzy avoided their eyes, then sighed, flicking from face to face. “Could you maybe... call me Jack?” She was twisting the hem of Dan's camisole around her fingers. “Maybe, uh... could I maybe be a boy?” 

“Do you... uh, do you want to be a boy full time?” Dan could feel himself stiffening, and he hated himself for it. What would that even make him? What would that make their relationship? Did they have a relationship? 

Was this even the time to talk about this shit? Was there ever a right time for this shit?

Suzy shrugged, even more self conscious. "Just... I wanna be a boy tonight."

"I'd be glad to spend the evening with such a lovely boy," said Arin, and he tried to lean forward and kiss Suzy on the mouth, over Dan's shoulder. All he really succeeded in doing was nearly throttling himself. While amusing, not very helpful in the present circumstances. 

"I... I guess, I, uh... I like boys," Dan said, and he felt stupid, but he kept his eyes on Suzy, leaning forward and down to kiss her - kiss him? No, it was too... confusing to do that. Unless Suzy said she wanted to be a he for the rest of time or at least as much time as Suzy was a part of it. As Jack was a part of it? 

"I'm sorry," Suzy mumbled against Dan's lips. "I feel like I just kinda sprung this on you." She pressed their foreheads together. 

"It's okay," Dan said, and he mouthed along her neck, aware that his own lipstick was leaving marks. "How about... how about you, uh... you take your new cock out for a spin. I'm sure it'll find a, uh... a happy home." He felt Arin grind up against his ass, and he smiled, nipping under Suzy's neck. 

"Yeah?" Suzy was breathing heavily. 

Dan's back was cold, and it took a minute for him to register why - Arin had moved, pressed against Suzy's side. His palm was skating across Suzy's front, sliding between her legs, squeezing the hardness there. It made something in Dan's chest jump when she moaned, something in his dick twitch. 

"I think I know a happy home for him," Arin was speaking at a lower register, his voice dark brown, and it was making Dan giddy, mixed with the scent of Suzy's neck - she'd worn cologne, washed her hair with men shampoo. She was devoted to her role. Or maybe she had put more thought into this than Dan had originally thought. 

"Oh yeah?" Suzy turned her head to kiss him on the mouth, and Dan pressed closer, so that they were fully chest to chest, the hem of his leather kilt brushing against her knees. 

"How would you feel about fucking a girl like me?" Arin fluttered his eyelashes, and it should have looked stupid - okay, it looked a little bit stupid - but it made Dan moan and grab Arin by the hair, kissing him as hard as he could, his tongue in Arin's mouth, his breath hot against Arin's face. 

"Fuck," Dan groaned, and now there were two mismatched hands moving along his body, from his belly to his hips to his chest, one hand tangling in his hair and one on the back of his neck, and he didn't know whose was whose, except that when he kissed one set of lips there was stubble, the other one didn't have any, but it was all such a mess.

Things seemed less complicated like this, when they were stumbling down the hallway, hands on butts, hands on chests, in hair. All bodies had skin, heartbeats, bones. He found himself flat on his back on the bed, and someone was straddling him, and he didn't know who they were, if they were a boy or a girl, and he didn't care. In his profoundest, heart of hearts, he did not care.

And that was what had been scaring him, wasn't it? That he didn't care, that he probably hadn't care for a good long while, possibly since he had started noticing that he was attracted to anyone, and that wasn't normal. There was no profound thunderclap or anything like that, and it all just felt... wrong.

This didn't feel wrong. It felt hectic, messy, hot, wet, tangled - Arin's dress was hiked up around his hips, his cock hard in the panties they'd put him in, his lipstick mussed. He was straddling Dan, his cock hard and familiar against Dan's, and Suzy was behind him, clumsily thrusting against him, still clothed. Dan's kilt had ended up hiked up as well, up around his waist, and his own erection was straining through the thin fabric they'd put it in. 

"Fuck, Suze, you feel... fuck, Suze, I want your dick," Arin moaned, and he had his hands behind his head, grabbing at Suzy's shoulders, pulling her closer. It thrust his chest out, and it all looked theatrical, like something out of a porn shoot.

It should have looked ridiculous. 

It really didn't.

"I... Dan, could you... could you turn the light on?" Suzy looked to the side, embarrassed and horny. "I want to... I want to see it." 

"See what?" Dan groped by the headboard, finding the switch and clicking it on. The room filled with a dim light, and Dan blinked - even the dimness felt too bright, somehow. All of this shit visible made it feel strange, almost like it was some kind of... some kind of something. Some kind of weird, surreal dream. 

"My dick," Suzy said. "I... I want Arin to suck me off." She stood up straighter, looking more confident. "I've got an... it's my dick. I want to see Arin's mouth on it."

"That has been my thought process in the past," Dan agreed, and he bit his lip, because if they were all going to be reckless and admitting to weird shit they wanted, he might as well join the club. "Um. Arin. Have you ever had your ass eaten out? Like, since we, uh... since we talked about it?"

Arin climbed off of Dan's hips, settling back on the bed, his legs agape and his lipstick smeared. "As a matter of fact, I haven't," he said, and he was smirking. "Are you volunteering."

"Well." Dan cleared his throat, immensely self conscious, even more turned on, his stomach a turmoil of arousal and confusion and a tiny bit of mockery. This all felt so stupid. But stupid shit was important. He was really beginning to realize this. "Well. I, uh... I do like to eat out pretty girls." He smiled in what he hoped was a seductive way, even though he felt stupid.

Fuck it. Arin wanted to be a lady for the night, Suzy wanted to be a man? What was Dan, then? Did it matter? 

He didn't even know. He was trying not to think about that. 

"Well, far be it from me to say no to such a tempting offer," said Arin, and he was smirking. "But, uh... Jack, why don't you take the place of honor, huh?" He indicated the big, fluffy pillows at the head of the bed. "And I'll suck your dick for you, as much as you want." 

"You'll suck me off until I cum?" Suzy was fumbling out of her boots, peeling her socks off as well. Her feet looked surprisingly dainty poking out of the cuffs of her jeans. "M-maybe I'll cum on your face." She smiled all in her countenance. 

"That wouldn't be very nice," Arin said, but he was crawling onto his belly, between Suzy's legs. He was kissing and nuzzling at Suzy's cock through her pants, and she was staring at him with wide eyes, a hard to read expression on her face. There was something desperate there, something like coming home, something like realizing something was missing, or being unsure of whether it had been missing in the first place. 

It was the kind of complicated emotional shit that made Dan's stomach curdle. 

But Arin was lying on his tummy, right in front of Dan, and Dan... well, Dan was trusting Arin to be.. clean, as it were. Hygienic. And Arin's ass did look amazing in the small green dress, and even more amazing when Dan pushed it up, kissing along the curve of Dan's ass in the lacy panties. 

Suzy was mumbling, and Dan only caught snatches of it as he pulled Arin's panties down, kissing along the cleft of his ass. Arin had shaved, which was gonna be a bitch in like three hours, but for now was amazing, silky smooth and warm. 

"Fuck you look so good with my dick in your mouth," Suzy was moaning, and when Dan glanced up, he saw that she was still staring down at him, her hands in his hair. "You... fuck, fuck, I can feel your tongue, yes, like th-that...."

Dan snorted, shifting around and holding Arin open with both hands. "This is gonna feel weird," he warned Arin, but Arin wasn't paying attention, because now there were wet, slightly gagging noises, as Arin swallowed down Suzy's cock, and she thrust it down his throat a bit too quickly. 

Typical beginner, getting their first blow job. 

Dan swiped the flat of his tongue across Arin's hole, absurdly grateful that Arin had showered so... thoroughly, that the club hadn't been too hot, that Arin was spread out in front of him, hot and familiar. This shouldn't have been nearly as hot as it was. He'd only eaten ass reluctantly in the past, but this... well, he'd be lying if he said he hadn't been wanting to do this for weeks and weeks. 

It was different from eating a woman out, that was for sure - Arin was bigger, for one thing, and he tasted... different. He was beginning to pinpoint it - men you smelled more than you tasted, way up in the back of your nose. Women, you tasted, at the very tip of your tongue. 

Although right now he was mostly tasting Arin. Arin surrounding his tongue, Arin moaning and gasping and squirming under him. It was a bit like eating out a girl, Well, no, okay, it wasn't, but it used the same muscles, and Arin was as hot as any fucking girl. His tongue was deep inside of Arin, wriggling, then moving to trace around his hole, kissing the outside of it.

"Fuck, that's... Dan, fuck," Arin groaned, and he was pressing his ass against Dan's face, his toes curling against Dan's sides. "Fuck, Dan, don't ever fucking stop, oh...." 

Dan pulled back, and there was lipstick on Arin's hole. It shouldn't have been sexy either. It shouldn't have been as funny as it was, and Dan was snickering, his face pressed against one of the cheeks of Arin's ass. There was gonna be more makeup on Arin's ass. Of course. It was pretty enough, it didn't need anything else. 

"Why is Dan laughing like that?" Suzy sounded slightly worried, through her haze of arousal. 

"You're pretty as you are," Dan wheezed out. "You don't need makeup."

"O... kay," Suzy said, and she looked down at Arin, who was still panting, dazed and horny. 

"Why don't we switch it up a bit?" Dan licked his lips, wiping the drool off of his chin. 

"But... I was liking this," Arin said, his voice halfway to a whine. "Why are we switching it up?" 

"Because I can't jerk you off if you're lying on your dick," Dan said, and Arin got on his knees fast enough that he nearly knocked Dan in the face.

"You know," Suzy said, her fingers carding through Arin's hair, "It's a miracle you haven't farted."

"Don't say that," Dan said hurriedly. "If you fart on my face, I am so out of here. There will be a fuckin'... Dan shaped hole in the air, like a fucking roadrunner."

"I'll have you know I've taken precautions," Arin said airily. He pressed his face against Suzy's cock, nuzzling it against his cheek. 

"And you can't take these precautions at the office?" Dan sat up a bit, on his knees. He forced Arin down further, so that his ass was fully up. It'd certainly be easy for Suzy to fuck his face now, and his throat would probably be nice and open. 

"It's hard on my guts, okay?" Arin took the head of Suzy's cock in his mouth and took it down, as far as he could. It was pretty damn far, too. The mouthful of cock was why he didn't make much in the way of noise when Dan spread him as open as he would go and pressed his tongue inside of him. 

This was... this was much better. He held Arin's cock in his hand, hot and heavy familiar, and he had Arin surrounding his tongue, gasping and moaning, jerking against Dan, moaning and whimpering around Suzy's cock.

He was taking it from both ends, and Dan closed his eyes - he could almost imagine sinking his dick right into Arin, right here, right now. But it didn't feel right, exactly. Tonight was about something complicated. Something strange. There was something very, very complicated in Suzy's face, and Dan wanted to probe at it, like a sore tooth. Like he wanted to just sink into Arin, as deep as he could, fuck him... fuck....

Dan groaned, kissing along the rim of Arin's hole, then pulling back, sliding his finger into Arin's ass. He curled his finger, feeling around the inside of Arin's ass. It was clenching, hot, gripping his finger. Dan pressed closer, until he was draped across Arin's back, his middle finger pressing against Arin's prostate, his other hand wrapped around Arin's dick.

"You like that, don't you?" Dan ground his dick against Arin's thigh. "How badly do you want this to be my dick, just filling you up?" Dan curled his finger, his knuckles stretching the thin ring of muscle. "Or maybe you want Suzy. Would you like that, Suzy?" He looked up at her, meeting her eyes. 

"I'd... I'd like that, fucking you like that, Arin." Her hands were in his hair. "I'd fuck you so good, so... so good, I'd do it...." She looked like she was about to cum, which was odd, because it wasn't like her cock was connected to her clit. 

Maybe it was. In a complicated sort of way. 

Suzy's orgasm came as a bit of a surprise to Arin, although clearly not as much of a surprise as it was to her. She grabbed Arin's hair, pulling his face to hers, and she kissed him with her whole mouth, as Dan fucked Arin with his long fingers and his tight fist, feeling Arin's whole body tighten.

"Look at how good you made Jack feel," Dan said, and he rocked his hips forward, pretty much fucking Arin's thigh now, so hard, so... complicatedly horny, in ways that he wasn't entirely sure he knew how to put into words. "All that... all that spunk on your face."

Arin did moan at that, and his ass clenched around Dan's fingers, his cock swelling in Dan's hand, then twitching as it spat cum onto the bed, leaving Arin weak kneed, and whimpering, actually trembling, and that was... holy shit, Dan wasn't used to Arin reacting like that. 

Nothing in this whole damn night had been normal, and if it hadn't been so intoxicating, he might have been a bit more scared. As it was, all he wanted was... he didn't know. He wanted to get off. He didn't know how, he didn't even know with who, he just knew he wanted it so badly that he was going to die if he didn't cum soon. 

"Su - Jack. Arin." Dan indicated his own dick, sitting flat, his legs spread wide. His erection was straining through the thin lace of the panties that Suzy had put him in. "I think this needs seeing to." 

"Does it now?" Arin said in a dark brown voice. He turned around, so that he was facing Dan, lying on his belly. Dan could see down the front of his dress, to the bra he'd put on underneath. It was black, and the straps were stark against his pale skin.

"Yeah," Dan said, pulling the kilt up higher, until the very hem of it was resting on his belly, and his (quite considerable, as he thought of it) cock was more or less on display, the tip poking out from the waistband. 

"You want us both to blow you?" Arin licked his lips, straddling Dan's leg. 

"Yeah," said Dan, and he smiled lazily at the both of them, shifting a bit to lean against the wall, putting his hands behind his head. "I'm just a rebel."

"Rebel, your face is a mess," Suzy said, crawling forward as well, cupping his cheek, then kissing, smudging her own lipstick, her breath warm and soft in his mouth. When he broke the kiss, Arin was there, kissing him as well, harder, the two of them right up against him, chest to chest to chest. It was hard to breathe, hard to think, everything was heat, everything was damp, everything....

"Wait a sec." Arin pulled back, blinking at Dan in the light of the bedroom. "How does wanting a double blow job make you a rebel?" 

"I don't know," Dan said, and he stretched his legs out more, circling his ankles. He was still wearing his shitkickers. Arin wasn't going to be pleased about boots on the bed, but fuck it. Dan would do the laundry. "I'm super horny, I've been staring at you two all night!" He made a vague flapping motion at the both of them. 

"Fair," Arin said, and he grinned, readjusting, until he could press his face into Dan's crotch, his cheek against Dan's dick. "Fuck, Dan, you smell so good."

"Now I know you're p-p-putting it on for effect," Dan mumbled, but he moaned louder when Suzy leaned down as well, and the both of them were mouthing along his cock through the damn panties. He looked down - their similar brown/blond hair, and when they looked up at him with their made up faces, it was... it was hard to tell them apart, at least to his addled brain. 

"Betcha we could make you cum in your panties," Suzy said, and she leaned down to mouth at the head of his cock, leaving lipstick prints on his dick and the panties. 

"Totally on," Arin said, and his mouth was there too, the two of them doing... something, Dan couldn't tell, because there were two pairs of hands on him, two mouths, and he had each hand on someone's head, the curve of his palm against the back of someone's skull, his fingers tangled in hair. It was... it was....

Dan's orgasm was familiar, apart from the intensity of it - his toes curled in the fishnet stockings, and his legs shook under Suzy and Arin's weight. He sagged against the wall, breathing heavily, actually shaking, taking his hands off of them, covering his face. 

“So, uh... what do we win?” Arin pulled himself further up Dan's body, his head on Dan's chest. “I feel like we worked hard enough for a reward.”

“I dunno right this moment, Arin,” Dan said, his voice as patient as the grave. He half pulled Suzy up as well, until she was leaning against him, her hand splayed open on his chest. “I just had a really fucking good orgasm, and it's made me kinda stupid.”

“You know, I could make a comment right now,” Arin said, cuddling up to Dan, and he kissed Dan messily on the cheek, his beard tickling. “About how you must have a lot of mind blowing orgasms.” He kissed Dan again, looking pleased with himself. 

Dan rolled his eyes, and kissed the top of Suzy's head. She was quiet – very quiet, and she still had on the harness, even though it was probably uncomfortable as hell. He'd have to have a conversation about that. 

Later.

Whatever they were – gender wise, name wise, whatever – came second to the fact that they were here. They were here, and they were warm, sharing breath with Dan, warming his skin. That was all that mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy this? Check out my Tumblr, TheseusInTheMaze.tumblr.com! I take ficlet requests!


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